9/11/01 - My Memory

I'm outraged this morning that the Coast Guard would conduct a "training exercise" THIS morning on the Potomac near the Pentagon. Turning on CNN to see and hear that "gun fire challenged a recreational craft" brought back visions of the crumbling towers and a sinking heart; helpless and bewildered. What were they thinking?

It is hard to reconcile that eight years ago those planes, driven and fueled by such hatred, slammed into the bustling microcosm of the World Trade Center and the Pentagon. I was at home recovering from a recent hospitalization and my sister-in-law Bea was staying with me. I turned on the television to see flames billowing from the Pentagon. I went into the kitchen to refill my coffee and Bea took my place in front of the TV. "No!" she said, "it's the Towers." It took me several minutes to understand that this attack was occurring on two venues.

Bea immediately got on the phone to find the whereabouts of family members in the NYC area. I sunk into the couch to begin my 24 hour vigil switching from CNN to NBC to CBS to ABC. The grim photos were on every station. Coming from a family with many members serving on fire and police departments, my prayers were now focused on the responders. Prayers for their safety and prayers for their success at rescuing survivors.

The phone began ringing and we reached out to neighbors and friends to find some solace in this national tragedy. Bea and I went out on frantic search for an American flag; something I am ashamed I did not have at the time. We met some friends at a local restaurant to recount the tragedy and begin our mourning; and fire up our resolve not to let this change our way of life. We joined members of the community in the park for a concert and prayer service. We had to share and grieve together.

Two days later, I had a doctor's appointment. I left Bea at the church to pray. While with my physician, the fire alarms began ringing in the medical tower and we were told to evacuate. My heart was racing and so was my mind. How could this be happening in Columbia, South Carolina? The patients, physicians and staff were all evacuated into the parking garage. I didn't think that this was such a good idea. Since I was parked there I decided to leave. All I wanted to do was get back to my house and in front of the TV. (The fire alarm was set off by a grease fire in the cafe on the third floor of the medical building.) It was weeks before I left that television for more than an hour or two. I can still hear the "silence" at Ground Zero when another victim was brought out of the rubble into the lights. I remember the announcement that the "search and rescue" was now a "search and recovery."

In April of 2002, I visited NYC. I was there for two days before I conjured up enough courage to go to Ground Zero and visit Battery Park. It was a silent pilgrimage. Along with many others, I walked the perimeter of the site, hearing the rumbling of machinery and seeing the bright lights piercing through the darkness of night. There are times that I wish I had not gone because my memory of the Towers is now changed; as is the skyline.

When I think of the Towers, I try to remember other days in the history of World Trade Center. I remember having Sunday brunch in the Windows of the World, sipping Mimosas and watching Lady Liberty keeping vigil over the harbor. God Bless America.