Addictive Thinking

Blogger's Note: This is strictly commentary and threads of thought. It's me, thinking out loud.

Additive thinking can be very logical, superficially, seductive and misleading.

I learned this week of a friend's son who is facing legal consequences from his addictive behavior resulting from his drug use. I do believe addiction is a mental illness, but I start questioning the validity of the premise that an individual can be genetically predisposed to addiction.

Is it nurture or nature that produces addiction? Is it the chicken or the egg? Does our genetic predisposition produce low self-esteem? And, that low self-esteem permeates one's thinking and then the parenting skills (or lack of skills) perpetuate the legacy of poor self-esteem? After being told over and over again that you are "wrong" or "need" to do things differently. . .you believe it. Self fulfilling prophecies.

Addiction comes in so many forms: alcohol, drugs (legal and illegal), smoking, caffeine, sexual behavior, people, gambling; just the short list.

The behaviors are a defense to thinking and feeling pain. The pain manifests itself in the guise of self-destructive actions; passive suicide if you will. And misery, loves company. Peer pressure is nothing more than "misery recruitment".

Think about how young (and old) people fall to peer pressure. They are made to think that they are "less" if they don't join the crowd. The "crowd" uses the same negative reinforcement that has been used on them to "keep them in line"; the aim is to destruct the self-esteem; question worthiness; control; withhold love and attention. The same is true for physical abusers; the act of violence is their addiction. Peer pressure works best on an already damaged self image.

Guilt and shame lie at the core of addictive thinking. While they are akin, they are ever so different and require much different healing methods. Guilt results from action; shame results from what we are. Guilt can lead to corrective action; shame leads to resignation and despair.

Socially, we create addicts. We set expectations of achievement as a requirement instead of an aspiration. We judge those who do not "fit in" and often ostracize them. We tell them they should be "ashamed" for not marching to the same beat.

Intolerance. Judgement. Gossip. Blame. Perhaps if we could do away with this "addictive thinking," we could help "cure" addiction.